Meditational Musings

 I think there's a misunderstanding between 'following your desires/bliss' regardless of what anyone else thinks, and caring what your partner's wants are and having them matter to you. It's the word between. They're not linked. Your internal desires and what you choose to feel inside don't have to have anything to do with what they want. What if you never actually have to compromise, in the sense of giving up on what you want in order to let them have theirs? What if the compromise, in that case, is letting go of the attachment of what that desired internal sensation looks like on the outside? From there it's just a matter of how much does the idea of what they want turn you off? So to speak. Be soft in what you want. Panic and fear do not end the dance any faster - they only make you stumble so much along the way that the dance is no fun and doesn't end where you want it to. Instead, let the music fill you, move you, sway you, and show you the perf...

 I am not my desires.  A desire is a thought in you. Maybe not in all people, but in you this author. You, the general you, are not your thoughts. We are the awareness behind our thoughts, not the thoughts themselves. Who or what we truly are is what is -behind- the mask of what we identify with/who we think we are. We are the awareness -behnd- the emotion, -behind- the thoughts. That is who we truly are.  being compassionate to yourself and to others - to the inner you and to the outer you - is the act of channeling. some can only accomplish it in very specific situations. others get so good at it that they can do it a lot more often, in a lot more types of situations. that channeling offers all kinds of abilities. how pure that connection is, how true to on-frequency it is dictates more of the energy allowed through. same is true of any(?) emotion's specific frequency. the types of abilities seem to differ in people mostly because of personal belief structures in place....

the only reason you should do anything is because you want to. "Do you meditate?" "Yes." "For how long?" "Oh, I try for an hour, but most days I only get maybe 20 minutes or so. You knw how it is." "Why do you usually get up from meditation?" "Work, can't stop thinking, kids, any number of reasons." "You got up too soon." "But-" "You got up too soon. It doesn't matter the reason. The only reason that would get a different answer is: Because I wanted to." Conundrum: Following that logic could mean things start falling apart in my life. Kids don't get fed/to school, work goes by the wayside. Let the universe orchestrate the vibrational matches. -You- decide how you want to feel. Anything that does not feel like that will fall away. Either the other people in your life will have a behavior pulled out of them that matches your vibration, or the situation as a whole will change into one tha...

 What they think about you doesn't matter. Their reaction to you is -their- manifestation. It's for them to deal with. What this translates to for -you- is that you never have to worry about what any of it means to them. The mental chess game of how to 'make them like you/understand you' is unnecessary. You can check in with them if you feel inspired to in the moment, but worrying over it before or after the fact? Never necessary. The following was obtained after re-reading the above passage: What if it's someone you don't want to hurt (emotionally or physically)?  Staying connected to who you truly are - keeping your attention toward that inner awareness/allowing yourself to be in the frequency of your 'home' self, whether incorporating in your desire frequencies or not, will make it so that hurting them isn't an option in the first place. That innate desire not to hurt them is already built in. It's already a desired frequency. And if they reac...

 did you think about the action to take? = not inspiration did you take an action without thinking about it? = that was inspiration. did you take an action without thinking abotu it, and then start thinking about what to do for the next step/piece? = you've left inspiration. Stop thinking. did you take an action without thinking about it, and it led to an undesired result? you have a limiting belief attached to the desire. purify the intention/desire and then go back to not thinking. purify: In other words, assess the frequency of your desire. Are there bits in it that you don't enjoy? If there are, then that needs to be refined. That's the 'purification'. it's okay. Ultimately, you can not get it wrong. if you take an action without thinking about it, only realizing later what you did, then you were acting from inspiration. you don't have to wait for a sign to act because the signs are not for that. The signs are for letting you know you aren't alone. T...

 one of the basic freedoms you've been asking for when you think you want freedom is freedom from thinking.  not to say you want to follow someone else. no. not sheep or cattle, in that sense. freedom from the vast amount of thoughts attached to every desire. judgements, worries, fears, doubts, definitions. all of those are bars on freedom. that observer state, that is your freedom. maintaining your ability to turn your focus wherever you -want- to turn it, rather than having an emotion or thought grip your focus away from you, is what you want. (Do you -want- to be feeling fear? Hatred? Anger? Anxiety? You may think it a logical reaction to the person, place or situation you're observing, but do you -want- to feel it? If not, you use focus to move your attention to something else. How well can you focus? Amazingly well, if you retain your grasp of your focus. It's when the thoughts and emotions dictate your focus that you have difficulty, or end up having difficulty.)

 separate emotions and related thoughts away from your desire. the slow way to do that is to think about it long enough that the 'flavor' of it wears off, or the 'oomph' goes away. it no longer holds any emotion for you. the related thoughts could be done by redefining what the desire means and tracking down along the thread of every related thought/feeling mix. these ways are good. and they work. but slowly. the faster way to do this is to witness the desire from the observer role/position. notice the attachments and emotions and definitions from that neutral, compassionate space. then look back to the desire itself, without those associations. when the desire no longer controls your emotion/focus is when it come flow easiest to you. there's a lot of anxiety around the idea of letting go of a desire. it's not about letting -go- of it. It's about not reacting to the desire itself. Or, rather, it's about not reacting to the thought of -not- getting that d...